|Wimborne Town. MOIST.|
What if pranksters took control of this farrago? What if pranksters took over at the FA* and deemed that non-league groundsmen's equipment had to conform to random bizarre values to justify their existence? What if pranksters created a Random Value Generator and handed out 1,000 different adjectives to our country's army of rusty rollers? Would the old boys be able to conform?
Well, it just so happens that I was given the pranksters' provisional list and was trusted to pull out random values from a fictional hat to give out to some of the rollers that I've photographed over the second half of the season. They were handed out as part of a pilot project last August. Let's see how they performed...
The first value out of the hat last summer was MOIST, which was allocated to Wimborne Town's roller. Well, it must have tried very hard to conform, judging by the amount of rust growing on the left-hand side. Not totally rusty though, so it wouldn't get top marks in the pranksters' grading system. A good pass, though.
*Some people might claim that pranksters already run the FA, but never mind, bear with me on this one...
|Laverstock & Ford. KITTENISH.|
Baby's name is Charlotte.
|Wantage Town. TIMOROUS.|
You can't hide from me though, matey! My rusty roller sixth sense will always dig you out...
|Liphook United. HARDCORE (YOU KNOW THE SCORE).|
|Hamworthy United. BONHOMOUS.|
Nice rust, by the way!
|Swindon Supermarine. BODACIOUS.|
|Verwood Town. SI-I-I-I-ICK.|
Incidentally, the values of SI-I-ICK and SI-I-I-ICK were allocated to Thetford Town and Cullompton Rangers's rollers respectively. They both did much better.
|Bangor City. SHRIVELLED.|
|Pagham FC. HAPPY-GO-LUCKY.|
Enough of this nonsense. Previous roller round-ups can be seen by clicking on the "Rollers etc" label on the right. Some of them were relatively sensible...
Thanks to everyone who popped in to read HAH this season (or if you just stopped by to look at the pictures, that's okay too!). Thanks also to all the American, Russian and Ukrainian automated false referral sites that leave their mark in the stats. If it wasn't for your efforts, I would have several thousand less page views! I still won't be clicking on your links, mind.
Back in a couple of weeks with some statistical stuff and some more photos.